We’ve all felt like the odd one out when starting a new school right? Well starting school or nursery when you are the parent can be just as daunting, if not worse! Fears and self-doubt can creep in and old leftover experiences of when we were younger can all surface again.
As a parent, waving the little ones off …well peeling them off you as was sometimes the case when mine were little is one milestone to get over. The next is standing there having waved them off and then walking home or back to the car-park alone.That feeling is the pits and I think, totally unnecessary! Now is the time to get in with or make your own Mum Tribe, it will make the next few years so much easier!
Here is the best beginners guide to making mum friends:
• Smile Smile Smile, it can take the place of a thousand words and can be a huge pick me up for whoever is on the receiving end.
• Make something happen! Arrange a coffee morning as a way to get to know people. Odds on you aren’t the only one feeling the same way. Arranging a time and place to meet takes the headache out of it for other people. We are all so busy that having to hang around and umm and ahhh over where to go often leads to absolutely nothing, nada. If you take the initiative and arrange something, even if only one person can make it then that’s fine, it’s one person you will always have to laugh with about that first get together.
• As with the point above, you have to make things happen. So, if someone asks you to go along to an event that they have planned then try your hardest to go. You might feel tired, not of washed your hair or don’t fancy meeting over the other side of town. The thing is making the effort and then feeling the benefit afterwards. You can even have a look at my post 5 tips to help the school run go smoother which should help in getting there on time and without being too stressed!
• If you have to go past other mums who are all gaggled together like they’ve known each other for years, take a deep breath, walk over and say hi. You’ll get a feel for them pretty quickly and you have the most legit get out of jail card by saying that you can’t stop as you have to dash off to work – doctors-friends etc. But what you would have done is broken the ice, said your name and made the first move.
I mean, what’s the worst that can happen!!
• Volunteer to help out at the school or nursery and before you go all shivery and think ‘No Friggin Way’… do it, even if it’s just the once. Think about it, you probably always have to talk to the teacher right? – So that’s one person who you know and can chat to. It’s your way in. If you volunteer for just one cake, book, uniform or whatever the heck sale it is then you will have people coming to you to talk and it’s ready-made intros.
It might seem a little daunting or hard work at first. Over time, just like when we were at school or starting out at work or uni, it falls into place and we settle with friends that we click with. Being in your new mum tribe is just one more path of being a fully fledged grown up. Enjoy the riches that these women can bring to your life.
What tips have you got? What were your first experiences of making your new mum friends.