Is social media and technology affecting your family?

“Come down for tea” I hollar cheerfully up the stairs….. a minute or so goes by….

“boys, come on my darlings, it’s on the table….” more time passes and not a peep can be heard.

It’s now on the table and I’m getting a bit irritated….”Boys!!”

I’m starting to boil now…. “Right I’m going to count to 3!”

Eventually they appear, not in the least bit aware of the effect of my shouting up the stairs. I’ve now got to get myself out of the self induced strop that I’m in because day after day my voice is just not having the effect I think it should. My little boys are getting into a world of their own and that world is inhabited by the likes of YouTube stars and watching people carry out the silliest of pranks on shows they and their friends find online.

Now, I love to blog, my youngest loves to vlog for my blog and I have brought them the gadgets to watch this stuff on so really the blame lands firmly with me, I realise that but it’s all starting to get on my wick a bit.

Me and the OH do chat about the gadgets in our house and the boys use of them. We are pretty good in a few areas, we don’t have any devices at the meal table, homework is done straight away and they both do classes after school. It’s still amazes me though how they can get so into the zone watching these things on YouTube. I push for things like newsround and adventure shows to throw in a bit of knowledge based learning but even Steve Backshaw has a bit of competition with the YouTube elite of Spencer et al.

Looking at the stats you can find for facebook, snapchat, instagram and all the other little cousins of the social media world you can see the millions of daily users and how year on year these are increasing to meet the demand of our younger generation hopping onto this online juggernaut. Even their games such as Fortnite can have them chatting for hours.

I find myself dreaming of giving it all up and living on a farm away from the bustle of modern life. I see the huge pitfalls too of making this leap; money, contacts, work, school to name but a few of the basics. It’s still so tempting!

I was watching a film the other night about a family shunning the modern way of living and relying more on natural skills and intellectual educational learning and I kept thinking the same thing; there was something missing. The more I thought about it the easier it was to see, the missing link was ‘balance‘.

Technology can have so many great benefits to us and our family life, we can instantly communicate with friends and relatives on the other side of the world and keep our links with these people alive and current. They can help with homework and general knowledge. On the other hand are our children’s social skills being permanently adversely affected? Are we protecting their well-being by letting them be in their rooms on social media apps that distort their communication methods into abbreviated text junk?

So, back to my thoughts about balance and what can I do to instil some balance in the way that we live our lives. We can take a moment to stop and think what we are filling our days with. We can discuss together whether this is the direction we want to continue in. Do we need to get back to basics. Not one of those political slogans but something that is right for our own families. Sitting and talking as a family, eating together at least once a day, spending time without phones, iPads or any form of devise. I’m willing to give this a go and put my other solution of wellington boots and the countryside to one side at the moment. I want us to connect.

Has technology affected the way that you and your family communicate with each other and have you seen this trend slowly change or were there certain triggers? Can they be a valuable aid for educational learning?

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If you enjoyed this post then I think that you’d love my 5 tips to help the school run go smoother.

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5 Tips to help the school run go smoother! It’s all in the planning!

So, it’s morning, even though it feels like the middle of the night because surely you have only had a nano second of sleep and the bloomin alarm is shrieking at the top of its voice that you should wake up. If you are anything like me then now is the time that the skill of juggling really comes into its own. Breakfast for the family, just a cuppa for me, after all it’s still the middle of the night in my head *note to self to be a good role model and eat well* it’s on my to-do list!

So before I get side tracked then – here are my top 5 things to help the school run go better!!

The key is, to start from the beginning……

1. Change the ring-tone of your alarm! For years I had the cutest sound of my boys saying for me to wake up, I couldn’t bear to take it off for ages but as the years wore on it was so loud and high-pitched that it wasn’t waking me up the right way. So I’ve saved it to be used for other things and now gone onto a lovely gently undulating tone that lets me wake up in a more gentle way as opposed to heart thumping shock to the system! Try it, even if it’s just for a week.

2. Breakfast, aside from the fact that I am a hypocrite and can’t stomach breakfast in the morning, make sure that the kids have it and digest it properly. In our house that would mean, trying to control their urges to practice dance, gym, football, karate moves while spooning in shreddies to their mouths, jumpers, hamsters and the floor.

3. Teeth! You might have got this one sorted. I have 50% success here, one boy is glued to the bathroom doing his hair, pearly white smile and generally grooming to perfection his appearance while the other one is, well lets just say…not quite there yet. You would have seen from one of my previous posts about motherhood that I have a little trick up my sleeve for how we are currently making sure his teeth are getting cleaned.

4. Everything has been lined up the night before, so we have; uniform, school bag, shoes, coat, drink and whichever activity they have (that they’ve told you about!) The 5 P’s are in operation here; Proper Planning Prevents Poor Performance. I’ll leave the 6th one out, after all it’s a family blog:0

5. Then it’s in the car with a double and triple check, a final grilling of have they got everything and off to school we go. 9 times out of ten this can work, on the odd occasion for us then this will be the point that one of them tells me that it’s World Book, Children in Need, day of the peach, environment, woman, man or child day! It’s at those times when I have to whistle a happy tune, turn the radio up and think happy thoughts!

How do your days go first thing in the morning? Have you got it sussed? Have you got any tips to share?

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Go Ape for Christmas!

The myrealfairy Christmas countdown continues here with an adventure for all the family.

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Your ticket to adventure – Why gift things when you can gift memories?

With vouchers from just £10 if you’re looking for a unique secret Santa present to impress employees or a thrill-seeker package for all the family, Go Ape has got it covered. Go on. They’ll love you for it.

Go Ape are firm believers that outdoor experiences make people happy. Whether it’s zipping through the tree tops, whizzing along the forest floor, or bouncing on our super springy bounce nets – at Go Ape there’s an adventure for everyone.

With 33 locations to choose from in the UK, your loved ones are in for one memorable experience.

The locations are so impressive, our local Go Ape is deep in the forest. When we have been on walks in the local area we have all looked up in awe at the tree top obstacles swaying above us. Being able to gift this experience at christmas is great and I can’t wait to see the look on my boys faces.

If you are wondering where your nearest Go Ape location is you can quickly find the nearest or furthest (if you are really looking to maximise the adventure!) one for you is right here.

Have fun with your tribe and have one more Christmas pressie wrapped up and ready to knock the socks off your chosen one.

Let me know how it goes and also if you have been to Go Ape before, share your experience in the comments section.

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Princess Party Pack Giveaway

Don’t you just love a party? Living life just like a princess can be made all the more real with my Princess Party Pack giveaway this week.

To set the princess party theme from the very start we have the You’re Invited invitation cards.

Cake decoration princess rings will twinkle on the birthday cake then a big slice can be given to everyone in their very own Princess Her Highness goodie bag.

Next up in this regal pack is the Thank You cards to show her perfect princess manners off to the full.

Good luck everyone!

Giveaway

To enter, use the Rafflecopter entry here.

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If you like this giveaway, you might enjoy this Olaf from Frozen one too!

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Is it just me?

Do you ever wonder if the bizarre, naughty or plain un-mummy things you think of are just you….I do!

Well here’s my confession….I don’t enjoy the responsibility all of the time.

1st disclaimer – if you’ve ever pursed your lips and tutted at someone who’s being un-mummyish then please don’t read on…. I need to have this vent.

I mean, I look at a lot of people and they seem to ‘cope’. Not only cope but even seem to enjoy being around their children all the time and doing mum stuff. One of the reasons I came off Facebook was because I couldn’t bear being mummy shamed by people looking relaxed and joyfully baking with their lovely little darlings, not just highdays and holidays, but regular as clockwork. Also making things and posting photos that show smiling clean children who look like they actually appreciate the perfectly turned out mum or dad next to them.

Here are a few of my sins:

I clock watch for when it’s time the kids have to go to bed. I also get a little excited as I look forward to it. My eyes flit from the bottle of wine, to the snack cupboard to my iPad, all gently purring my name in a frequency no one else in the house can hear.

I would rather not read a children’s story book all the way through at bedtime, I’m tired at 8 myself! The afore mentioned chorus of goodies downstairs is deafening to my ears by this point. I want my children to read well and I want to celebrate with them…just earlier in the evening please.

I’d like to spend more time and money on grown up stuff like make-up and clothes. Instead I blow it on boys toys, classes and kids ‘stuff’. I spend time on my things, I just need to balance it out a bit more.

I don’t particularly enjoy having their friends round, only because I find it stressful. Their friends are great – it’s me! What if they get hurt, fall out with each other or hear me swear under my breath as I stub my toe and then they repeat on a loop, steadily driving me into anxiety overload. Or worse, after having a successful couple of hours, burst into tears as soon as their parents arrive. It happens! I don’t know why, but it’s a kids phenomenon, they do it to torment adults.

Sometimes I just don’t get it – I don’t understand the rules of parenting, I forget that children are immature, yeah doh! I find myself standing in the middle of a room trying to reason with two boys who just want to tease, argue, play and do their own thing without mature interruption.

Finally, I’d like to be strong enough to actually follow through, just once, with whatever I’ve threatened to take away ‘by the time I count to three!’ Even my eldest at 10 started saying that I don’t ever do it, he’s 12 now and nothing has changed. So I’m inconsistent now and freak out at the small stuff.

2nd Disclaimer: Of course I love my kids! Of course I wouldn’t change a bloomin thing and of course my kids are my world. They fill me to bursting point with love and make me boil over with a loyalty to protect them.

But this parenting lark can be bloomin hard and sometimes I need to let off steam! Away from the kids, into my own little space. Sometimes it’s good to shout from the rooftops or into blogging world that it’s tough – without having to apologise or justify…..at least not too much;)

Do you ever feel the same or is it all plain sailing for you?

When I flip the other way I start worrying about the future and when they go out into the big wide world, I call it pre-empty nest syndrome. Hormones clearly play a big role in parenting for me and the huge job demands big feelings.

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Updated October 2018

It’s Homework Time

Homework, creative play, jotters, notes stuck on the wall are all on the go in our house. My eldest is now self sufficient and takes his whiteboard where he needs to be.

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It’s a busy Thursday afternoon in our house and we have just all bounded in through the front door almost rolling in the cascade of shoes, blazers and bags as the boys start shedding their school skin and morphing into home boys. At 9 and 12 they have gone past the novelty of school and are now firmly planted into the routine. They love being on the go and all the joys that school brings aswell as the woes of coming to grips with the understanding that algebra may seem like a waste of time to a young lad. Fast forward to a time when he has to fill his car up with petrol, has £20 and has to work out how many litres he can afford if each litre is a certain price, then he might just see the ‘point’ of it all.

So with homework to add to the daily learning schedule, drinks and snacks are procured, the first pangs of hunger dealt with then our homework time can begin!

I have been sent a whiteboard to try out and very excited about. We have an A3 Folding Wedge Landscape which as you can see from the photos is a great size, has a carry handle on top and looks very sleek. It feels robust enough to tackle being carried around and assembled in an array of places which will surely happen.

Now that my eldest is in senior year his homework has really increased and needs far more planning and thought behind it.

As far as the geography project goes, it has to be done! One of the things I was pleased about was that my eldest was suitably impressed with how it looked. In the days of image being very important, to get a big tick and dare I say it a grin from my growing lad, were signs we were off to a great start.

The board is perfect for standing on the table as you can see and working with it on either end will give you the views you need depending on the project.

Use a drywipe eraser to clean off the writing and start again. This can be done really simply and within seconds the board is ready to use again. Even with the bright orange we used, it didn’t stain or leave the shadow of the words, it was bright white once again.

As the board is designed to make use of both sides, one side was used for written planning and one side was used for the layout of the design.

I love the use of all sorts of learning aids and devices to enhance the experience for my kids. This board helped with the visual display of bringing together what was in his head.

My youngest didn’t want to be left out of trying our new board and as soon as his big brother had finished his homework he folded it down and carried it up to his room where he settled into his bean bag for some relaxation time. He loved the easy flow the board created for his drawing skills to flood out without worrying about mistakes or scrabbling around for scrap paper. This was one of the quietest after school times I’d had in a while and it was great to see the boys so engrossed in what they were doing.

It's Homework Time — Not one to be left out of the fun!

Conclusions:

For us this is something that is not just limited to homework. As a company director I have so many uses for this board and I will be sneaking this away to use on many occasions. Travelling is a big part of what I do and gone are the days when people want to be encumbered by large items to battle out of the car. This board can be used to illustrate the steps my team decide upon to take projects forward and are great for recording those idea provoking discussions. The fact that I can carry it next to my computer case with ease is a huge buying point for me.

It is fun, it looks good and it has a use! So many gadgets get forgotten, this one won’t.

Have you got whiteboards at home. How do you think you would use them within your environment? Let me know in the comments below, it’s good to share.

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Disclaimer: I was gifted a whiteboard for the purpose of this review. All thoughts and opinions included in the post are my own.

Fortnite and the middle aged mum

Fortnite….have you heard of it? If you have kids between the ages of about 7 and 17 it’s pretty hard not to. But me a middle aged mum being thrown into this world and not wanting to be dragged out of it is a bit more unusual…I think. It’s almost like oil and water, they just don’t mix. I’m desperate to see if I’m the only mum out there who has got completely sucked in by this ridiculously addictive game.

This global phenomenon is Epic Games Fortnite; launched in July 2017 with Save the World which I know zip about, was soon followed by Battle Royal in the September and it’s this mode that has flattered itself into my life.

It started with a seemingly innocent question from my youngest who is 9 asking me if he could download a game on his iPad. I have to put a password for any game he wishes to have and that’s the only reason he thinks to ask. So when I saw what it was and the picture had guns on it I took a breath to say no and both him and his brother equally sucked in their breath to let loose with pleads and begging which eventually turned into a full explanation of what the game was in a bid to get the gold coated password they wanted. I had a chat with my other half and he said there was no blood or guts to be seen and it was really popular. After putting up a bit of a fight I gave in, pretty standard response from me.

Download complete but onto our PS4 or 3 or whatever the box in the corner is that goes in the telly rather than onto the iPads. The boys were over the moon, you would have thought that I was actually mum of the year. If this is all it takes then parenting is easy peasy. 12 years of thinking things through has normally gotten me pretty stressed and constantly at odds with myself about if I was making good decisions. This was a breeze, if only I liked Facebook I could go on there and put some ‘loving mummy time’ or ‘families together’ quotes and gushy pictures while the kids were in euphoric mode just to prove that I had this thing sewn up.

In a nutshell what is Fortnite for the unenlightened whom I can now look down on smugly…well the whole aim is to be the last person standing. Have you seen the hunger games? It’s pretty much that but on game version.

100 players, 1 battlebus, 1 map with the same town and location places on every jump, loads of ‘loot’ goodies such as guns, shields and traps to help you stay alive.

The game matches up 100 people including yourself, you all set off in the battlebus and jump off over a point in the map you want to land, you then skydive out of the battlebus. Float down to your chosen place……along with 99 others who are just as eager to be the last one standing and let the fun begin. Oh just incase that wasn’t enough, there’s a storm circle closing in so that you can’t just find a bush and hide in it. This is great though as it makes each game around 20 minutes maximum which is just about enough. Considering that the youngsters with their dexterous digits normally eliminate me in about half that time, 20 minutes is something to aspire to.

There’s lots of stats out there which show that around 125 million people have Fortnite accounts and it’s been reported that at any one time there can be over 3 million players online. Crazy numbers.

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The thing is, I find that it’s really family friendly. Yes there’s guns and you fight to survive but it has ‘something’ that is engaging that makes us all sit together having a family competition for the best score and we have not done something like that in a long while. This game gets us together and for me that’s great. Will it last? Who knows, we’ve been through the Minecraft and Candy Crush fads and although you think it’s the best thing at the time fads fade and something new and shiny comes along.

So why do I feel in the minority and think that men and boys appear to play more?

Do they ‘switch’ off better than women?

Do they have that ability to put aside the fact that the kids dentists appointments need to be booked or where did I put the letter from the insurance that came through yesterday. It sounds sexist but is it true nonetheless?

I would love to hear from any other mums, with your tales of the Fortnite effect, let’s hear if it’s your guilty pleasure too. In the words of the great Delia Smith on the terraces ‘Let’s be avin ya!’

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Family festival in Hamworthy Park

The hot weather is continuing here and it’s taken me a bit by surprise, I really feel like we are having a summer, it’s brilliant! Just about every day we are all heading down to the beach for a swim which I love and the boys love even more. They are straight in and swimming before I can even get the towels out.

One of the beaches I used to go to when I was little was Hamworthy beach as I grew up around there and could walk to it quite easily with my family. Last weekend I was pleased to be invited by the bournemouth bloggers to a family festival held in hamworthy park and organised by Sorted in Dorset. This is an initiative set up by the people behind Party in the Park, a family-focused community festival which started in 2001 and over a 15 year period became the most popular event in Poole, Dorset.

Hamworthy Park has limited parking next to it and the park and beach was full so it took a bit of time to find somewhere but we managed in the end. As it was so hot, everyone was out and about so it was to be expected. I dropped my OH and the boys off so that they could stretch their legs and play a bit of footie. Really, if I’m honest I’d rather park up without the ‘help’ of my nearest and dearest!

We arrived as the party was getting into full swing by the sounds of the music. There was a mixed bunch of musical talents through the day from Maddie Thorp to Luke Truth. Live music always makes you have a spring in your step. I would love to be far more musical than I am, it’s something I admire in others.

There were lots of food and drink stall at the event. One of the stalls I wanted to go to was the Dorset Ginger company and I’d already tweeted them beforehand to say that I would be stopping by. I have a real thing for ginger drinks at the moment and I wanted to try a really good quality one. I had a taste of the original and then went all out for the strong one which for my palate was just right! This ginger drink can be enjoyed on its own or as a mixer. Alternatively it can be used in baking. Suits me brilliantly as I create alot of recipes for my blog and I know that I will incorporate it into a cake or cookies at some point. For the moment I’ll go with one of the recommendations of mixing it with lemonade and Pimms, delicious for the summer.

Little one was hungry which is not surprising and he had enough places to choose from. He decided on a bacon buttie to keep away the hunger and he thoroughly enjoyed it. One of the good things was that there were hay bales around the place and we found some in the shade have our refreshment break.

With a day like that we needed to keep drinking and refill dorset were raising awareness of their Reuse, Refill and Refresh campaign. Anywhere that you see the Refill logo you will be able to fill up your water bottles.

All in all we made the most of what was on offer, there were rides for the little ones and football shooting practice for the slightly bigger ones. The food and music were a great bonus and the event had a nice relaxed family feel to it.

Unfortunately due to low attendance overall at the hamworthy event, the next one which was due to be held in Bournemouth in August has been cancelled. That’s such a shame but understandable that sometimes these decisions have to be made. Here’s to hoping the event organisers reschedule and we hear more from them soon. Good luck to them.

I’m off to create some new recipes like my carrot cake and chocolate brownies! Yum.

What have you been up to so far? Are you planning trips around Dorset this summer?

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5 Easy Steps to Making a Raised Bed

With 5 easy steps to making a raised bed you can see in pictures how to put together this easy construction and to get ideas for what materials you can use.

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We have become more and more involved with gardening since moving into our new house a few years ago. I find it so relaxing to be able to potter outside when I get home from work and on the weekend. There are so many jobs that need doing and I spend alot of time with my OH talking about what we can do to make our ideas come to life. Like most people we have to remember to balance what we want with the reality that our garden has to be right for the whole family. Back when we moved in our first project was the spring garden make over where some of the things we considered were how we could make the garden ‘boy friendly’ as our boys love playing football.

This year we have looked at having a raised bed at the far end of the garden to make use of a little patch that has been all but forgotten. It’s a bit shady and was just a great big mound of earth that really looked a bit soft and not good for anything.

For ages we said that we should do something with it and last year I scattered a few beetroot seeds over it just as a passing thought. Nothing came of them really as it gets trodden on when the bikes are bought out of the shed and once again its left looking a bit sorry for itself.

So this year it was time to do something about it and make it work for us. We decided on a raised bed, we are not full on DIY people but as you can see from our pallet garden, my OH can construct a thing or two and that recycled garden area has been a great success using free pallets and a little bit of brain power. It lasts really well too.

So back to the raised bed at hand. We decided on a structure we could put together easily without cutting and drilling, one of the reasons being because we don’t have the tools to hand. We are big fans of recycling so it was a step away from using what we had around to buying in the metal and using the fast track choice. This will mean that we will be making use of it for a long time or if we do change the use of it then we will ourselves recycle the materials. There are lots of different stores which sell these and we chose one that was having a closing down sale so picked it up for a bargain price.

For this 5 Easy Steps to Making a Raised Bed I’ve used pictures to show how my two happy helpers got stuck in …and how quick it was to create.

Step 1

Here’s the patch of earth I was talking about before, pretty basic eh? We gave it a rough measuring out beforehand. My son and OH then created a flat area and gave it a good weeding.

Raised Bed — My son showing off the ‘before’ area.

Step 2

Like any good construction project my chaps had a good long look at all the bits they were going to assemble! Oh and by now it started to rain!

Step 3

Structure up and slotted together perfectly, no banging on the fingers, hopping on one foot after dropping a hammer, nada!

Step 4

At this point I think I did help with the carrying up to the end of the garden, or at least shouting encouraging words, I can’t quite remember. The bed fitted in perfectly.

Step 5

Numerous trips then followed to bring the soil and compost up there to fill it up. We roughed up the base soil which it was sitting on first so that it would feed in the nutrients from the rich soil we were putting on above.

We were now ready to go! I have been reading and thinking about what I want to try growing in this area and it will be mainly root vegetables but for the first year I will have a little experiment with a few different types. I’ll keep you posted on how it goes. For now this is a brilliant raised bed completed in just one afternoon.

What projects have you been carrying out in your garden?

What do you think to the idea of a raised bed?

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Fathers Day Gift Guide 2018

Fathers Day is just round the corner and it’s time to get those thinking caps on again for some of those great pressies which are out there. I’ve got some ideas that can give you a nudge in the right direction.

We all have different living arrangements and fathers, mothers and grandparents day can be a tricky one to navigate if you don’t necessarily fit into those brackets. Celebrating our own uniqueness with love and acceptance is a good way to go. On any given day you can show and help our little ones to demonstrate the love to those who help to bring them up.

Personalized Cart.com is one of those sites that is full with unusual gifts that you don’t see everywhere. I spent a long time browsing through so many ideas. I decided on the watch case as one of my favourites. There are lots of different sizes and styles. One of the bigger ones is a wonderfully large with dimensions of: 12.6″x 10.2″ x 6.3″(32cmX26cmX16cm) so as you can see, it’s a good size, plenty big enough to store away those more valuable items.

Pretty Gifted provides that final flourish that makes your gift look like a million dollars!

It’s a 6 step easy process to make your bespoke paper. Pick a paper, pick a font, pick a foil, write your message, pick a font size and pick an icon. You are guided through the steps and it really is very straight forward. I enjoyed it!

You can either wrap your pressies in it or I think that designing the paper and giving it as a present itself is a great idea. I chose to make some paper with the boys for their dad. His favourite colour is orange so I was pleased to see a bright orange design and then see the writing really pop out. My OH never does things by half so we knew that he would love these bright colours.

Adding a special something to your Father’s Day gifts can also come as a low cost or no cost price tag. Crafting your labels and cards will also go a long way to bringing the grin to dads face.

We love vouchers and you can easily make ‘dads vouchers’ with the kids which can be used at anytime by the big man. You can use slogans such as “Dad gets a lie in” One free hug” or for the older kids; “One car wash” or “5 cups of tea”. Have fun with what dad enjoys the most and get crafting.

What are you going to get up to and what ideas do you have?